Thinly-Sourced Childhood Personage Updates

Koko the Gorilla: Still alive.

All-Ball the Cat: Still dead and TRAGIC.

The girl and the llama from Me and My Llama: The girl, probably still alive. The llama, probably not.

Everyone from Voyage of the Mimi: Unknown except for the one who’s Ben Affleck.

The Mathnet Detectives: Lady detective was so awesome that we can’t possibly expect anything more from her, adorable dude detective fathered a son who played ‘Dead Nerd’ on a Buffy episode.

The girl from the Ray Bradbury movie about only having sunshine one day a year and the other jerk kids lock her up and she misses it, but they give her some flowers and we’re supposed to get over the whole thing: Stopped making movies immediately, because why give other children pleasure?

The shopping bag lady from that short filmstrip about how you shouldn’t be mean to bag ladies: Hopefully still riddling sensitive children with reflexive guilt since 1975.

Wishbone the Dog: Living on a beautiful farm upstate.