Brad Pitt Ducks the Full Celebrity Cacophony

“I spent the ’90s trying to hide out, trying to duck the full celebrity cacophony. I started to get sick of myself sitting on a couch, holding a joint, hiding out. It started feeling pathetic. It became very clear to me that I was intent on trying to find a movie about an interesting life, but I wasn’t living an interesting life myself. I think that my marriage [to actress Jennifer Aniston] had something to do with it. Trying to pretend the marriage was something that it wasn’t. … One of the greatest, smartest things I ever did was give my kids Angie as their mom. She is such a great mom. Oh, man, I’m so happy to have her.”
 — Regardless of whether you care about celebrities or pretend to not care about celebrities, everyone cares, somewhere, somehow, about Brad, Jen, and Angelina, right? Don’t say no! Or, say no, you sanctimonious living treasure (use of “sanctimonious” cribbed from here). What is it about them? Some kind of modern-day bible story? A living crèche? Anyway, this quote! Brad, what are you thinking? Hold a joint, hide out. Put some Uggs on. Switch the “d” and “f” in that first sentence.

Update: “It grieves me that this was interpreted this way. Jen is an incredibly giving, loving and hilarious woman who remains my friend. It is an important relationship I value greatly. The point I was trying to make is not that Jen was dull, but that I was becoming dull to myself — and that, I am responsible for.”