Titles of Best-Selling Books Had the Publishing Industry Decided to Do Product Placement

by Lauren Bans and Gabrielle Moss

All the Kikkoman’s Men

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Sbarro’s

Running With Sizzler’s

What We Talk About When We Talk About Mountain Dew: Code Red

Tender Is the Tasti D Lite

The World According to AARP

The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Mayer

The Grapes of Welch

Would You Please Shop at Pathmark, Please?

A Million Little Reeses

Rabbit Runner’s World

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stonewashed Levi’s

Portrait of the Artist as a Young Whopper

As I Lane Bryant

The Plot Against American Apparel

The Virgin Sudafeds

The Lion, the Witch, and the Jennifer Lopez for Kohl’s Activewear Collection

The Sun Also Pfizers

Everything Is Illuminated With GE

Lady Chatterly’s Spanx

He’s Just Not That Into GOOP

Lauren Bans is an editor at GQ. Gabrielle Moss is a freelance writer.