The First Time Every Spice Girl Killed an Animal, in Verse

According to their 1997 book, ‘Girl Power

Photo: Astro Pabs

Emma “Baby Spice”

“I had a baby bird once
and my mum told me to feed it
while she went away.
Unfortunately, I’d spent all my money going out the night before,
so I fed it some of my nan’s bird food instead — only her bird is a parrot.
When I came in
the next morning
it was on its back,
I felt terrible.
It must have choked to death — 
horrible!”

Mel B. “Scary Spice”

“My mum and sister
thought that I actually killed my guinea pig,
but I didn’t.
I used to kill spiders
all the time,
but nothing else.”

Mel C. “Sporty Spice”

“I used to kill flies
by snapping them with elastic bands.
One time I killed a really big bluebottle and felt guilty for weeks
because it was really big
— not just a fly, but a proper creature.
I kept having dreams about this fly’s family
attacking me while I was asleep.
I was also really worried about God being angry with me.”

Victoria “Posh Spice”

“I used to collect worms
and lay them out on a slate,
chop them up
and watch them go their separate ways.
Then I’d put all the bits in a jam jar.”

Geri “Ginger Spice”

“My brother and I were in a gang
and we used to lift up the tiles in the back garden
and pour petrol on the woodlice underneath,
set light to them
and burn them.”

Rebecca McCarthy is an Awl intern and a bookseller.