Catchphrases of the Dwellers of My Favorite Coffee Shop
by Kevin Smokler
“Is it a Good Morning?”
“Mostly milk, a little cream. You’re doing it wrong! Just hand me the sugar packet!”
“[tongue click] Congress [head shake]”
“Wifi Password?”
“No thanks, I brought my own mug. Tree murder, ya know?”
“Sign this Petition!”
“If this is decaf, why am I shaking?”
“If this is a scone, why is it round?”
“StartupsVCsMetricsTractionCodeBase.”
“Restroom Key?”
“Who stole the Restroom Key?”
“Me again.”
“I said, the USUAL.”
Kevin Smokler is the author of forthcoming essay collection Practical Classics: Rereading Your Favorite Books From High School (Prometheus Books 2013) and has written for the LA Times, Fast Company, and the Believer. He lives in San Francisco and tweets @Weegee.
Photo by PeterG, via Shutterstock