“Happy Birthday to…You?”

The magical Mallory Ortberg, also known her by her commenter name, “melis,” is another year older, and sadly, probably another year further away from the days when someone would’ve made a sweet rap video about it. But we can try singing? “Happy birthday, Muh-LEEEASE?… Muh-LISSS? MELLLL-isss?… MELLLL-eess?”