Birch Stripping for the Uninitiated

“What is a toxin? It may surprise you to learn how many toxins we come in contact with during the course of an ordinary day: Sitting, computers, materialism, smelling, desserts (Japanese), metal, not saying yes to yourself, hesitation, textiles, cooking, recession, texting, chewing, desserts (Western), low self-esteem, tight hamstrings, suffering, parents, yoga (non-Bikram), yoga (all other kinds), shoes, vaccines, doctors, books, driving, cooking, shameful sex dreams, exciting sex dreams, and folding.”
 — Mallory Ortberg takes us beyond the Blueprint Cleanse. If you’re not into cleanses, please enjoy Wikipedia’s list of sandwiches. They are all a source of toxins. If that phrase terrifies you, you may have chemophobia.