The Globster Makeover

Do you ever feel like you want to pour yourself onto the beach and just lie there forever, slowly jiggling in the sun? We’ve all been there. But even on days like this, you can still pull off the illusion of having a face. Here are a few tips for a quick makeover.

The first thing you need is foundation. Ask a “friend” to help, if you don’t have a free “hand” or “flipper” or “tentacle.” Try to get as much coverage as possible.

The second step is concealer, which you want to apply everywhere the foundation didn’t cover. Be sure to slather it over your entire thing.

Next, try a soft crème blush. Neutral tones like peachy-blue-ish-grey often work well, but really, it’s about whatever you feel goes best with your coloring. Put a few polka dots of this on your “cheek bone” — or, really, anywhere in the upper blob region.

Then, apply eyeshadow somewhere above the “cheeks.” Put a bit more below the “brow bone,” to provide definition when your “eyes” are “open.”

For lashes, use a waterproof, volumizing mascara. You’ll want to concentrate on the base of the “eyeline” to create the illusion of eyes and eyelashes. Feel free to draw one, two or three “eyes,” or even more! It’s your glob.

Finally, the lips: Use a neutral lip pencil to “define” your “lips.” Apply it below the “eyes,” and below wherever you’d like to pretend you have a nose/ breathing hole/ beak. One mouth is traditional, but a whole row would be absolutely puzzling. To pull the look together, add a sheer lip gloss with a hint of pink.

Previously: Our Squid, Ourselves

Natalie Eve Garrett has the illusion of a face. Prints of her art are for sale here.