Overheard at a Labor Video Viewing Party
by Mackenzie Mays
“Oh my God, are those your lips?”
“I cannot believe how clean-shaven!”
“How did you even reach it to shave it? How could you see it?”
“I will have a full-out bush and not give a fuck, believe that.”
“WAS THAT ‘THE RIP’?”
“Or do they call it ‘The Tear’?”
“Nothin’ like a good cheesy baby.”
“Well now I can’t eat cheese for a while.”
“Annnnnd that’s your butthole.”
“Just kidding I can’t not eat cheese.”
“Oh your butthole is like, also straining huh?”
“Did you poop?”
“I’m sick.”
“Nope.”
“Ah, push it.”
“ZOOM OUT, MAN. ZOOM OUT.”
“I love my little bundle of joy. MY IUD.”
“How did you not chip a tooth?”
“What’s your vag look like right now?”
“You have to hold your own legs up?”
“Could you like, squirt your milk across the room right now?”
“Don’t squirt me!”
“My mom refused an epidural.”
“I’m not going to use an epidural.”
“OK can’t wait for my epidural.”
Previously: Overheard at a Women-Only Charity Event