Please Join Me In Freaking The Fuck Out About Lana Del Rey’s Latest Single

by Helen Holmes

Thoughts on Lana Del Rey’s “High by the Beach,” after 700 listens:

1. “High by the Beach” is Lana Del Rey’s masterpiece. It represents a return to form; a gloomy sonic bridge between her worshipful taste for men (particularly older men) and her true purest delight, namely, getting stoned and having an amazing fucking time.

2. It’s a slow, rolling jam punctuated with muted church organs and mechanical blips that remind me of “Lollipop,” another perfect song. It’s a lullaby I want to ride a dick to.

3. Like “Lollipop,” “High by the Beach” has possibly the catchiest chorus I’ve ever aurally processed. I will be humming it for the whole of August.

4. Here, Lana’s trilling, Snow White-like harmonies are at once fuzzy and insistent, like a beautiful ghost is trying to get your attention by haunting an a.m. radio.

5. THIS IS LANA’S “GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN.” GIRLS JUST WANNA GET HIGH BY THE BEACH TO ESCAPE THE PAIN OF A BROKEN RELATIONSHIP WITH A MAN UNWORTHY OF THEIR AFFECTION.

6. Sample lyric: “The truth is I never / Bought into your bullshit / When you would pay tribute to me / Cause I know that / All I wanted to do is get high by the beach”

7. “High by the Beach” clocks in at 4:19 because Lizzy Grant is a TRICKSTER GODDESS.

8. I want to get every word of this song tattooed on my face. Might.