All Your Faves Are Evil
by Alexandra Molotkow
Art Garfunkel is an 8,000-year-old vampire with a surprisingly boring childhood
Keith Richards ate cockroaches to freak out his kids
Pete Seeger axe-murdered a family in Utah before he was famous
The Kinks’ iconic boots were made out of human skin
Billy Joel filled all his maracas with fingernails
Elvis Costello keeps a giant ball of hair stolen from each of his conquests
Paul McCartney dosed school kids with heroin “for a larf”
Phil Collins collects the jerky of endangered animals
Bruce Springsteen named his dog Hey just to fuck with its head
Prince relaxes in a pit of snakes
Elton John is secretly an Ogre