Terrible Pick-Up Lines

Today over on the Marie Claire blog, Maura Kelly excerpts from a strange new old book called How the World Makes Love … and What It Taught a Jilted Groom, specifically from a chapter on bad pick-up lines from around the world. They’re not so bad. But I like this one, from India.

“My parents have already engaged us to be married. They just forgot to tell you.”

Just how I like my guys: stiff and a little bit frightening. Anyway, let’s do this! Here’s mine, delivered at a bar in the Cobble Hill neighborhood of Brooklyn, in 2007: “I’d offer to buy you a drink, but I only have $10 and was going to get myself one. I would get your email though, I guess.” And that’s not even that good, I’m just getting the ball rolling. I’m rolling the ball to you. If you were a ball, I would roll you. Was your mother a ball because I want to be a-round you.