On Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver’s Separation

Edith: Did you hear about Arnold and Maria?

Cassie: I did, I read about it on my phone while my eyes were still barely open. It is a sad way to start the day.

Edith: It makes me so sad. Why is it so sad?

Cassie: Because even though they appeared to have almost nothing in common, their relationship seemed to somehow work. Except I guess not, since it’s ending now.

Edith: I saw it on the Daily What, where there is this picture.

Cassie: They looked so happy.

Edith: Is there a way to teach people about love that also incorporates the seeming inevitabilty of divorce?

Cassie: Yes, I think we need to shift our model of marriage. Rather than being for life, it should be for up to 25 years, at which point (or any point during that time) you can re-evaluate and move on if you have grown apart.

Edith: That makes me sad, too.

Cassie: Think of their extremely good looking children and how sad they must be.

Edith: They’ll be OK.

Cassie: The thing that also made me sad is that last night on Twitter people were making #terminatordivorce jokes, etc., and I thought, my god, imagine if your parents were splitting up, and all of Twitter was joking about it.

Edith: Ahh, yeah. But also, “In late March, Schwarzenegger announced a collaboration with famed comic book creator Stan Lee, saying, ‘I have never had a conversation with Maria about any of this. I think it will be a big surprise.’ “ And he’s doing more Terminator movies, so maybe it kind of is a #terminatordivorce.

Cassie: Indeed. I liked Pareene’s joke the best: “It’s not a tumor, it’s a decision your mother and I made that has nothing to do with you, I promise, we both still love you very much.” It’s more of #kindergartencopdivorce, but still.

Edith: Haha.

Cassie: Question: do you think they have been living separate lives for years, but stayed together because he was the governator?

Edith: No. I get the impression this was pretty sudden. Or, recent. But who knows.

Cassie: Yeah, maybe he cheated?

Edith: They apparently would always publicly share announcements of their anniversary, and they’d do stuff in public together and all that, but this year their anniversary passed in silence! April 26.

Cassie: : ( I feel, sadly, that this was almost inevitable. Because she is, after all, a Kennedy, and their marriages all end in divorce or death. Premature death, I should clarify. Because all marriages eventually end in death!

Edith: Everything ends in death.

Cassie: Except Mormon marriages, which last all the way into eternity. Which sounds like kind of a nightmare, personally.

Photo via Flickr