Celebrities All Have Little Real Teeth Under Their Big Fake Teeth

Do you ever think about this?

Image: Gage Skidmore; Art: Kelly

Here’s something to think about: celebrities all have little tiny real teeth hiding under their big Hollywood fake teeth. Do you ever think about this?

A mouth of secret lovelies, stained and forgotten. Little guys hiding, snug as a bug. Tiny teeth grown naturally — shh, they’re sleeping. Like many cosmetic procedures, the process of shaving down little real teeth and putting porcelain veneers over them is not something actors often talk about even though it is very obvious that they have done it and everyone else talks about it a lot. Miley Cyrus did share a dental x-ray, though, once, and that is an exception.

But that’s OK. We’re not here to talk about celebrities and their secrets. Everyone knows celebrities have gigantic fake teeth because of how obvious and scary it is to see, and because of how it’s right on their face — not in the middle where the nose is, but right below that. They can act like they were born with the same exact enormous white teeth as everyone else at the Emmys all they want. Have fun, who cares. We’re just here to say: Do you ever think about how they have little tiny real teeth under there, too?

Image: Peter Pham; Teeth: Kelly

It’s a little sad, about the real teeth. They were once the main show, during smiling and talking, but now they’re hidden and forgotten. Poor little teeth. I bet they thought the rising celebrity status of the mouth was going to mean big things for them. And now look. Covered in porcelain, can’t even see ’em anymore.

Here’s what else: Do you know that the guy who invented porcelain veneers invented them for actors specifically? Maybe you did, but I didn’t. Look at this quote from this teeth website:

In Hollywood, during the 1930s, California dentist Dr. Charles L. Pincus(1904–1986), developed the process which revolutionized cosmetic dentistry.

He molded porcelain into the shape of a tooth, and then using denture adhesive, glued it to the outside surface (lingual) of a Hollywood starlet’s teeth to temporarily improve her smile.

And look at this funny video:

Heh.

In conclusion, please remember all of Hollywood’s little natural teeth.

Image: Themeplus; Teeth: Kelly

They did good biting for many years.