Nü-Metal Songs Ranked, With Brief Commentary

by Alexandra Molotkow

32. Korn, “Got the Life”
I hate Korn

31. Incubus, “You Will Be A Hot Dancer”
Iew

30. Powerman 5000, “When Worlds Collide”
Wouldn’t want to live in Rob’s shadow

29. Papa Roach, “Last Resort”
Literally what u sound like

28. Limp Bizkit, “Faith”
Show us your titties

27. Econoline Crush, “Surefire”
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah

26. Incubus, “A Certain Shade of Green”
Unrequited love

25. Disturbed, “Stupify””
Bouncy castle

24. Coal Chamber, “Loco”
Frightening

23. Orgy, “Stitches”
Not frightening

22. Deftones, “Nosebleed”
Madonna proteges

21. Kid Rock, “Bawitdaba”
“I prefer ‘Cowboy’” — Haley

20. Incubus, “New Skin”
Skin is so weird

19. finger eleven, “Drag You Down”
Not boyfriend material, if you know what I mean

18. Pitchshifter, “Microwaved”
So true

17. Sevendust, Denial
Denial: Not a good thing

16. Kittie, “Charlotte”
“NO!”

15. Tool, “46&2”
Epic

14. Deftones, “Knife Prty”
So watch out

13. Deftones, “Lhabia”
Misspelling of “labia”

12. System of a Down, “War?”
Message song

11. System of a Down, “Sugar”
Actual artists

10. Tool, “Ænema”
Too soon?

9. Deftones, “Be Quiet and Drive (Far Away)”
Would do it with Chino

8. Rage Against the Machine, “Bulls On Parade”
Get out ya seat and jump around

7. Slipknot, “Wait and Bleed”
Show us your tiddies

6. Deftones, “My Own Summer (Shove It)”
So true

5. Limp Bizkit, “Break Stuff”
Could do, could do

4. Tool, “Stinkfist”
Society is a butt

3. Kittie, “Brackish”
$30 on “import”

2. White Zombie, “More Human Than Human”
The bad daddy of NüMe

1. Rage Against the Machine, “Killing In the Name Of”
yep