OK, so I’ll be real with you: I don’t have a NYT subscription and I am always very wary about…

We’ve both seen it happen again and again. When a woman speaks in a professional setting, she walks a tightrope. Either she’s barely heard or she’s judged as too aggressive. When a man says virtually the same thing, heads nod in appreciation for his fine idea. As a result, women often decide that saying less is more.

[…]

As this and other research shows, women who worry that talking “too much” will cause them to be disliked are not paranoid; they are often right.

OK, so I’ll be real with you: I don’t have a NYT subscription and I am always very wary about clicking around aimlessly on the Internet out of fear I will waste a click. (Article compilers: ALWAYS TELL ME WHAT I AM GOING TO CLICK ON. I ONLY HAVE 4 ARTICLES LEFT TO READ THIS MONTH FOR FREE AND I AM NOT WASTING THEM.) The Women at Work series is always worth a read, but if you’re already out of articles for the month, here’s all you need to know: everything is still the worst. Women who speak up more at work are thought to be bossy, unhelpful, and less competent than their male counterparts.

Remember Sheryl Sandberg’s (who co-wrote this article with Adam Grant) whole push to eliminate bossy? That never really did it for me — -I genuinely don’t mind being called “bossy,” because I am bossy. It’s true! I tend to take control of situations and assume I’m in charge. Fine! So sue me (please don’t sue me). Sandberg and Grant provide some solid, realistic solutions to change this — -namely, diversify offices and hire more women in leadership roles, which I am 100% behind — -but this might be a good way to start: why don’t we just embrace bossy? When people call women bossy, we know now what they really mean — -”she’s a woman who dares to share her opinion!” — -so to that I say: “That’s me!” It reminds me of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler’s (two women who are not afraid of the bossy moniker) fantastic Weekend Update sketch about people calling Hillary Clinton a bitch, where they implored us not to get offended by it and prompted a million Tumblr GIFs and thinkpieces with the reminder that “bitches get stuff done.” And we do (research shows, when it comes to leadership, men are more confident but women are more competent). Just focus on the subtext: when a man calls a woman a “bitch” or “bossy,” he is saying “I don’t like that you are speaking out, I don’t like your good ideas, I want to put you in your place and shame you for doing this.” Screw that guy — -let’s reclaim those words, because being a powerful, outspoken, confident woman is never anything to be ashamed about.

But really: who cares what people say? I’m too busy bossing people around to think about that.