Alec Baldwin Orange is the New Black Fantasy
Remember in Easy Rider when Jack Nicholson and Dennis Hopper embraced the counterculture and took off on their motorcycles to find America and themselves? That basically just happened this morning.
But instead of Dennis and Jack, it was Alec Baldwin.
And instead of a motorcycle jacket, he went for a more badass look and wore a visor.
And instead of riding a motorcycle, he just rode a bicycle. But it WASN’T a Citibike, because of counterculture and DOWN WITH THE MAN, right??
Anyway, Alec Baldwin was arrested for riding his bike the wrong way on Fifth Avenue this morning and apparently he was belligerent.
The silver lining to all of this though? I’d like to imagine a world where Alec Baldwin is sent to prison but the inmates are all from Orange is the New Black:
Alec Baldwin: So who wants to play Words With Friends?
Pennsatucky: I killed an abortion doctor once.
Alec Baldwin: Political! You probably recognize me then from when I had my own show on MSNBC?
Big Boo: So you’re new here?
Alec Baldwin: Another man here! I’m so relieved. I thought I was surrounded by lesbians. I mean I love lesbians! I have even tweeted about how I personally have many gay friends!
Red: So what are you in here for?
Alec Baldwin: Biking…in the wrong lane. And you?
Red: No one knows yet, but it’s probably really sad!!!
Alec Baldwin: [spots Piper] And who is this?
Piper: I’m Piper. I tell long stories about my love triangle and I also make artisanal bath soaps!
Alec Baldwin: [Scared straight, so he changes his life and makes completely different choices]
[Photo via Netflix]