Mysterious Jellyfish Washes Up on Tasmanian Beach, Is Casually the Size of a Smart Car

“It’s not new because it’s large… It’s new because its structural features are unlike other species, it just so happens that this one is huge. It’s the size of a Smart Car.”

And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were sore afraid. Then the angel said to them, “I bring you a Smart-Car size jellyfish. Today, on a beach in Tasmania, a Ruler has been born to you; he is an unidentified 5-foot-wide jellyfish, BYE.” [Guardian, h/t]