When I Die, Bury Me With Several Carefully Embalmed Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

Via Smithsonian:

High-standing members of society and their pets weren’t the only pieces of dead flesh getting mummified in ancient Egypt.

That’s a gross sentence! Please go on.

Meat offerings, too, were given the kingly mummy treatment.

“Girl, are you the ancient Osiris, because here’s a meat offering for you — “

Food mummies, researchers from the UK and Egypt write, complete the “trilogy” of Egyptian mummies, alongside humans and animals. Now, they have figured out just how those meat mummies came into being and withstood the trial of time.

Here is how: the embalmers sometimes used more advanced techniques for the Forever Short Ribs than they did for the human mummies. From the mummy study: “In the case of the tomb of Yuya and Tjuia (18th Dynasty, 1386–1349 BC), a balm associated with a beef rib mummy contain[ed] a high abundance of Pistacia resin… [which is] more sophisticated than the balms found on many contemporaneous human mummies.”

Sounds about right. Here’s the real question: what food would you want to be buried with? Pizza is a real contender for me as well.