Baby Swaddling for Evil and Profit

Slate has a cute piece about swaddling (swaddling being the absolute greatest of the re-discovered infant soothing tools), which is pretty straightforward, except for the one super-persistent lady in the comments who firmly believes it to be an instrument of baby torture, and that the babies who instantly smile and fall asleep AND STAY ASLEEP FOR BEAUTIFUL HOURS are just frozen in fear like bunny rabbits. Please please go look for her comments. She goes by “ann.”

We kept swaddling longer than you’re supposed to (just make sure you stop before they can roll over, which is different for different babies), because she loved it so much, and had to wean her off by first leaving one arm out (see left), then just wrapping it under both arms, then just putting her in a tight sleeper, and now she sleeps on her hands and knees with her butt in the air, rendering her overnight diaper completely useless.

Now, admittedly, the current “nothing in the crib except a sheet and possibly an ugly breathable mesh bumper” recommendations do make your straitjacketed baby look even more institutionalized than she would otherwise, but thems the breaks of living in the post-Mad Men era.

Putting them on their backs is best. They will probably sleep better on their stomachs. We kind of did that thing where you put them on their side to sleep, propped up with pillows, and she slept really, really well, but we also felt constantly terrified about it. I told our pediatrician, and she was all “look, what can I tell you? she should probably be on her back.” And she was totally right. You do what you do, and now she’s big and sleeps surrounded by stuffed animals and when I come to get her in the morning she waves at me, so it gets easier and better.

IN THIS ONE WAY. I’m not telling you about her eating or pooping habits, because she has a right to her little baby privacy.