Reality TV Star: The Quiz

By The Hairpin July 2, 2012

by Rose Surnow and Alison Leiby

Is it your destiny to be on a reality TV show? Fill out this quiz and find out!

1. Your favorite makeup look is…
a. No makeup, keep it natural.
b. Light blush and red lips.
c. Tight, orange face with mascara streaming down your cheeks from crying.

2. To be on TV you would be willing to…
a. Cultivate a talent such as acting, writing, or directing.
b. Do nothing, not a big attention person.
c. Drive a convertible into your ex husband’s casino and curse him out in front of your kids.

3. The secret to staying young at heart is…
a. Living an active life.
b. A personal trainer and monthly vajazzle routine.
c. Having lots of close friends.

4. A good idea for a first date is…
a. Dinner and a movie.
b. Doing poppers in a hot tub.
c. Hiking and a picnic.

5. On a relaxing night in, you enjoy…
a. Reading your favorite book.
b. Bleaching your anus.
c. Watching a movie.

6. You felt most alive when…
a. You climbed a volcano in Hawaii.
b. You gave birth to your first child.
c. You blackmailed your mother for $10,000.

7. Your life philosophy is…
a. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
b. Love is all you need.
c. Oh heeeeeeeelll no! (And then slap someone.)

8. Your most meaningful possession is…
a. Your children.
b. The Emmy that you stole at a dinner party.
c. Your college diploma.

9. The celebrity you most relate to is…
a. Tina Fey.
b. Hillary Clinton.
c. Bernie Madoff.

10. The most important thing to bring to a parent-teacher conference is…
a. Your son’s report card.
b. Hoop earrings.
c. An open mind.

Rose Surnow is a humor writer for VICE, Jezebel, The Hairpin, and others. Follow her @rosesurnow. Alison Leiby is a comedian, writer and co-founder of Heavy Browsing. Follow her @alisonleiby.