Really Good Books That Happen to Be My Father’s Favorites

My father, in addition to providing great advice (“you will never remember the money you saved on a cheap hotel room or a bad meal”) and being kind of an incredible grifter (it takes chops to find a fun, twenty-something girlfriend who supports YOU financially in your early-dotage), has exquisite taste in literature, so let’s delve into it for Father’s Day. My Mother’s Day disclaimer about some mothers being dead or terrible is still in effect, of course, though I feel that having terrible fathers is somewhat more normalized in our culture? Like if you say “my dad’s a jerk,” people are more inclined to say “ugh, that sucks,” while “my mother is a bad person” can result in a weird tumult of projecting and judgment. I digress! My dad’s AWESOME, these are his favourite books.

To the Lighthouse, Virginia Woolf — When I very first started doing reading lists for you, I said that there was no point in listing the BEST books, because people already know what those are. Ahem. TIME PASSES, BITCHES. The hallway! His arms empty! Staggering genius. Staggering, staggering genius. The Divine Ms. Woolf. Always. Anon.

Papillon, Henri Charriere — This is the most entertaining book ever written, and I do not care how much of it is made up. I have read it ninety-six times since I read it for the first time when I was…seven? God, no wonder I have problems. Too many books about penal colonies at a young age. Highlights include the leper colony, and the several months Charriere claims to have spent with “the Indians,” during which time he acquired two major hotties who became his wives, and worked out their jealousy with each other by sexing him extravagantly and graphically. Also, he did not kill the pimp, it was a frame-up.

The Brothers Karamazov, Fyodor Dostoevsky — Yes! It’s great! It is also Laura Bush’s favourite book, which everyone was all eye-rolly about, but it’s a great book! What did you want her to say? WHAT WAS SHE SUPPOSED TO SAY? I totally buy that this could be someone’s favourite book. And Jesus IS probably Dubya’s favourite philosopher, which is also probably okay. Did you want him to say Derrida? I have used that joke in another blog post, but am using it again now. I did not like the Bushes, except I thought Bush One was not so terrible. It’s a little funny to read Anne Lamott’s older stuff, because she’s all BUSH IS A WAR CRIMINAL, and I’m all, yeah, legit, I guess? Because of the rendition? But then I checked the publication date, and she meant Bush One, who was not really much of a war criminal. Anyway. THIS BOOK IS REALLY GREAT.

Kristin Lavransdatter, Sigrid Undset — I have not read this book, but have just ordered it, and my father says he reads it every five years, need it or not. Devotees of massive early 20th century Norwegian historical sagas chime in?

A Shropshire Lad, A.E. Housman — Oh. I can’t even say something funny about this, because it’s so beautiful. “Loveliest of trees, the cherry now / Is hung with bloom along the bough.” Oh, he was such a beautiful poet. I mean, a lot of his poems are “lovely lovely lovely thing…such a shame I’m going to die,” but, when you think about it, that’s a LOT of poetry.

The Whitsun Weddings, Philip Larkin — HM. The Whitsun Weddings is the best Philip Larkin collection that isn’t The Less Deceived, but we’ll save that for our upcoming reading list: Really Good Books by Philip Larkin. The Whitsun Weddings is still better than any other book of poetry by someone other than Philip Larkin.