Super Deep Conditioning: A Review

This video doesn’t really teach us anything about how this deep conditioning treatment works, which is a bummer because I’ve had it done once and I was wondering. The last time we covered my gray roots, Naomi said “We have a promotion right now: half-off deep conditioning! You really need it. I really think you should do it. It would be a really good idea for you to do it.” (Yes, I’m pretty sure those were her exact words, only said in an accent, but which one?) As a person who dyes her hair regularly, I figured that though I hadn’t noticed, there’s a pretty good chance that from her vantage point, my hair was kind of a wreck. So I decided to take one for the team and shell out the, I think it was something like $40? But in hindsight, it wasn’t worth it.

Let me preface this: my salon has massage chairs at the wash station and flat screen TVs that hang above you playing Sabrina and Fall Issue, which really isn’t fair. (Not to mention the million scalp massages this treatment can involve.) And everything is very reasonably priced. ANY extra time you can spend there is living the dream, so I’m not really complaining.

As for the results, whenever you have a blowout, you expect your hair to feel shiny and healthy and amazing when you leave the salon, right? It did that day! Which is great and just what I wanted, but this didn’t help me answer Naomi’s pleading questions, “See, isn’t that better? It’s so much healthier looking. AND feeling. Right? Aren’t you glad we did this?”

“I don’t know, Naomi! Honestly, I cannot tell today. It feels fine? I mean yes, you did a great job. I’m being a jerk! Maybe after I wash it?”

But even then I couldn’t tell. It seemed… the same? If anything, and this could also be seasonal, my hair has felt a little too conditioned or greasy lately. Like every time I wash it, it never feels totally washed. Take that as a compliment if you will, Inphenom. Also, change your name.

Verdict that I’m forcing myself to come down with because my next touchup is in a few hours and I want to walk through the door with a little more resolve this time, but with the clause that maybe after not having it done, I’ll notice how much worse my hair looks and feels next week: Not worth it, especially not at full price.

This post is dedicated to Edith Zimmerman, the most askiest-about-deep-conditioning woman in my life.