It’s Called Romance, Look It Up

So, a guy breaks into a fancy house in France and pretends it’s his in order to impress an American girl he likes.

He tried to create a romantic atmosphere with champagne, candles and rose petals sprinkled round a bed. But his attempts to fill the empty roof-top pool flooded the house below.

Whoops! But back to that “romantic atmosphere,” could you be more specific?

He made it his own by pinning up images of Winnie the Pooh and the Manchester United football team, as well as putting up a black pirate flag.

Sexy.

But, faced with an empty pool on the roof, he decided to fill it by turning on the outdoor showers and the garden watering system.

Oh, good catch! I wonder what his date thought of all his hard work?

Then he left to go to Nice and meet his date, who turned up three hours late and refused to accompany him back.

Are you kidding me with this?! I’m sure a few days later, after being arrested and fined $78K, the dude slinked off to his own actual home, embarrassed and heartbroken, never to be heard from again.

The morning after the night before, the villa’s owner reportedly answered his front door to find the man once more, who informed him that he had slept in his car and wanted his things back.

The end!