Never Lie to Cab Drivers

… Because when one asks you what should be a simple question, and instead of giving him the complicated answer (“well, actually…”) you give him the easy answer (“yes”), which isn’t true, he’ll invariably (or at least one time) follow the simple question with a dozen more-probing questions about the first question, all of which you’ll answer with more lies, until it spreads outward into this ghostly, alternate-universe life story, because the lies you’re saying would be true, probably, if the people involved were still alive, which they’re not. And then 20 minutes later you’re saying, “Yes, good, that is my plan, I will ___ tonight.” Anyway, cabs! Always ready to go wherever.