How to Not Sleep With Bartenders 2.0

by Wilma P.

1. Go to the bar with your friend.

2. Have her go to the bathroom and never come out.

3. Ask the bartender you’re trying to not sleep with for help.

4. Have him pick the lock and then turn away in horror when he opens the door.

5. Have your friend be passed out on the toilet with her pants off.

6. Have the bartender somehow cut his hand during the lock-picking, so there’s blood everywhere and he says he has to go to the hospital.

7. He tells you both to never come back to the bar.

Wilma P. is a mess.