I Had a Stroke When I Was 26

By The Hairpin June 7, 2011

by Nina Mitchell

I am a quirky young woman whose Mind went Pop. Mindpop. My stroke took away my limbs and speech for awhile. Here are some chronicles…

I. Another Form of Beauty

“Look at my eyes.
I said, my eyes.”

-From an ad for Cap 48, a Belgian disability organization.

II. Dr. Strangelove Arm

I have one arm that sometimes moves in directions I don’t want it to. This is called spasticity (spastic-ity). Stroke victims call it less cordial names.

III. Botox

I am due for some poison.

After a stroke, some muscles may become unable to relax. Biceps (arm muscle) might always be “on,” always bent up. The arm cannot relax and straighten. Not only is it annoying to have an arm bent all the time, it gets really sore.

One solution: make it harder for a messed-up nervous system to boss muscles around. For me, doctors do this by temporarily killing off the junctions where the nerves talk to the muscles, in this case wrongly. The poison is Botox. Botox is famous for petrifying celebrities’ faces. It is a poison that makes it hard for celebrities to frown. On me, it makes my arm harder to bend.

The injections are not pleasant. I prefer to be anywhere else. The procedure feels like a regular injection, except it keeps going on and on. Doctors keep poking with needles as they try to figure out where the poison will work best. They have a machine, about the size of a cigarette box, that helps them pinpoint exactly where. It makes noise: Beep…Beep…Poke!….Ow! ….Beep…Beep…Poke!….Ow! It lasts about half an hour.

Over the next few weeks the results get stronger. Then, poisoned limbs feel weak and numb: sort of hot and cold at the same time. It gives you the chance to work weak muscles that can’t compete with your messed-up strong ones. The junctions grow back after about three months. If you have good results, you can get another set of pokes then.

Does this work? I think so. I still have hand therapy, so you cannot perfectly know. My hand specialist says she can tell when I am near the end of a three month session. Their muscles are less cooperative.

Beep…Beep…Poke!….Ow!

My arm is very youthful.

IV. Wicked Stepsister

My speech therapist said that my old self is “your wicked stepsister,” someone you hold up as perfect, now that you are not.

Previously: Other Mindpop posts.

Nina Mitchell had a stroke when she was 26. More chronicles are at Mindpop or Facebook.

Image via Cap48