What Is Making Couples So Mad?

Being in a relationship with someone you love is wonderful. So, so wonderful. You get to hold each other and protect each other from the pain of life, you get to grow old together, you get to have children and watch them grow, and you get to fight. Constantly. At least that is what the Daily Mail, the world’s most respected scientific journal, is reporting. According to a new study, “couples bicker an average of 2,455 times a year.” That’s between six and seven times a day — so we’re getting mad at each other every four hours! Or I guess probably every two hours during the day and then not at all when we’re asleep at night (except for when one of you is snoring). What are we so upset about? Here’s a handy infographic:

“Walking past things that need to go upstairs”? Seems like maybe we could all agree to let that one go, just for the sake of making peace. But I am fully on board with getting mad about not closing cupboard doors! Why can’t you just close them? You open and close lots of other things all the time — like your fly, and…I don’t know, there must be other things that you open and close a lot. Car doors! You can close car doors, so why can’t you do it in the kitchen too? Jesus, now I’m in a lather. See you back here in two hours for another fight! Love you!