“People Still Think That I’m the Same Sad Skank I Was in 2005”

“Even people like Kelly Osbourne feel free to fuck with me. A few nights ago, when she appeared on Fashion Police with Joan Rivers, the bitch called me a crackhead. … This is a girl whose life I have saved twice, once with C.P.R. and another time with C.P.R. and violence — by which I mean I had to poke her furiously in certain places to wake her up from her coma. … For some reason, Kim Stewart also called me when Paris Hilton got pulled over for her last D.U.I. And Lindsay Lohan called me after she was arrested. … I’m not even that friendly with these girls. What am I, a junkie Auntie Mame?”
 — Courtney Love, in a sloppy, charming, and amazing interview on addiction-and-recovery blog The Fix.