Pill Bottles TL;DR
We no longer understand the words “drowsiness” and “avoid.”
… phrases such as “may cause drowsiness” are no longer “readily understood” and should now be simplified to say “this medicine may make you sleepy.”
Likewise, the phrases “avoid alcoholic drink” and “take at regular intervals” caused indecision among modern takers. The report recommends the labels should now read “do not drink alcohol while taking this medicine” and “space the doses evenly throughout the day.”
Actually, yeah. It sucks that we’re super stupid now, but this makes sense and is probably overdue. “Don’t drink alcohol while taking this medicine” is a lot clearer than “avoid alcoholic drink.” Because “avoid alcoholic drink,” in its staid little doctor voice is almost a little … flirty. Like, “Do your best but if it finds you, it fiiinds you, haha!” Whereas “don’t drink alcohol” is like, “STFU, do this right.” And that’s The Hairpin’s unfunny stance on what pill bottles say.