I’m Sad That the Barry Manllow Is Sold Out, But I Understand Why

barry manilow manllow

Hypothetically, I can imagine that sometimes spooning a regular pillow isn’t enough when you are sobbing ceaselessly into your Cheeto-stained sheets in the middle of the night and it is raining outside and your bamboo plant just died. (Don’t worry, your roommate can’t hear you because you have cranked up the volume on that episode of Roseanne.)

Why? Your pillow can’t make eye contact.

It can’t smile at you knowingly as if to say, “Girl, everything is going to be just fine.”

Lo and behold, some brilliant Etsy user has come to that totally-hypothetical person’s rescue and created the Barry Manllow: a pillow so masculine and with hair so feathered that, in his cotton poly-blend arms, you can’t help but feel soothed.

Unfortunately this item has been out of stock for almost a year now, but I bet it won’t stop that hypothetical person from bookmarking the page just in case. And emailing the owner of the account. And clearing some of the dirty laundry from her bed to make room.

[via]