Have You Lost Your Mind Over the New Zodiac?
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“My sign is not my sign?!” you screamed. Well, your sign probably is your sign, unless you really want to change it, in which case here’s a list of the new signs (although I’d rather kill myself than be a Taurus).
Capricorn: Jan. 20-Feb. 16
Aquarius: Feb. 16-March 11
Pisces: March 11-April 18
Aries: April 18-May 13
Taurus: May 13-June 21
Gemini: June 21-July 20
Cancer: July 20-Aug. 10
Leo: Aug. 10-Sept. 16
Virgo: Sept. 16-Oct. 30
Libra: Oct. 30-Nov. 23
Scorpio: Nov. 23-Dec. 17
Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20
Oh nah nah, what’s my sign? No, I know my sign. (I need my sign.)