Sluts and Cheaters Share the Same Gene
Slutty drunk liberals who enjoy infidelity, horror movies, and gambling are that way on purpose: they all tend to have the same variation of the DRD4 gene, which is associated with dopamine rushes and the thrill of the new. (People without the variation are more likely to be fine with the regular old stuff.)
Which is also why you can never, ever trust people who like horror movies — except as friends, because then they’ll have good stories. But otherwise avoid them, because they’ll cheat on you and why would anyone like being scared? It truly makes no sense. (Also: Don’t let anyone try to tell you I Am Legend isn’t a horror movie, because it is terrifying. All five million minutes of it. Or 101 minutes, I guess, but basically it’s endless.)
But yes, cheaters and sluts. One quick way to tell if you have the slutty/cheating gene is to look down at your fingers, and if you have a wedding ring on your left hand but have also had sex with other people since you’ve been wearing it, you might have the gene.